Smells Like Bethan
by Sparkling-Butterbeer2.0
Summary: Basically the opening scene of Smells Like Trouble... WITH A BETHAN TWIST! Rated for author's pottymouth.


**A/N: Hey guys! Sparkle here, with my first ever…. BETHAN FANFIC! *cue confetti* I was watching MBAV Smells Like Trouble a few weeks ago… Then this happened. I got up in the middle of the night to write this down, but Dad wasn't too happy about that… I apologize if it makes no sense, as it switches POVs often, plus I'm still in school so my writing style and grammar aren't perfect. There are swears in here because I am a firm believer that if this wasn't Disney, there would be so much cussing you wouldn't know what to do with yourselves. I also put in random author's comments. You don't like it, tough. You can all fucking deal. Enjoy. *hides in corner* **

**Plz dont sue me I no own thx havaniceday. ^u^**

Ethan had liked Benny for a really long time now, he just didn't have the guts to ask him out. He wouldn't be able to stand it if Benny hated him! Thus, his smokescreen, Sarah. I mean, yeah, she was a supernatural vampire hottie **(She really is. Dayum, girl!)** who was also too nice for her own good, but she just wasn't Ethan's type (if you know what I mean). One night, as Ethan was preparing to cut his losses with Benny and ask Sarah on a date, Benny offered to help him by pretending to be Sarah! Ethan was excited, but he didn't raise his hopes too high. No point getting excited if he was just gonna get hurt in the end, right? Ethan turned his attention back to his video chat with Benny. "Now, I'll pretend to be Sarah." Said Benny, smiling. Ethan sat down in his chair, and let out a huff.

"This is stupid." he said.

"Just do it." groaned Benny. Ethan huffed.

"Okay!" He cleared his throat. "Hey Sarah." Benny looked up.

"Oh, hey Ethan! Just hanging out, you know, shopping and stuff." Benny giggled. He was getting waaaaay too into character…

"I was just wondering, if you wanted to go see the new Galaxatack movie with me?" said Ethan, making an awkward facial expression, trying to make Benny see the hint. Benny faked looking surprised.

"You and me? Like, a date? Hmmm… No." Benny said. Ethan broke character for a minute.

"Hey! I thought you were supposed to be helping me?!" he said, annoyed.

"I am! What are you gonna do if she says no?! What, just give up?!" Benny said incredulously. Ethan looked thoughtful.

"Hm, yeah probably." He didn't even like her anyway, so why push for a date?

"WRONG ANSWER! Close the deal! Convince me! Make me feel like I'm the only girl in the world. Be a man." Benny put a towel on his head. "Be my man." He said flirtatiously. **(I am probably horribly butchering this whole "flirting" thing, seeing as how the only guy I've ever dated was a complete asshole and an old classmate.)** Ethan's heart stuttered at that, even if _completely straight_ Benny said it as a joke.

"I'd really like to go on a date with _you_. You and I have this connection, that's really special. I feel like there is some cosmic reason why we were thrown together." Benny interrupted him.

"That's beautiful Ethan…" he said quietly. Goddamit Benny! Can't you turn off the dunce act for just a second and see what I'm trying to say here?! Suddenly Ethan felt a need to add something to make Benny believe he was still talking to an imaginary Sarah.

"Plus, you are, like, **(Argh! Too many damn commas, Ethan!)** really pretty." All of a sudden, Ethan's dad busts in!

Ross POV:

I was bringing Ethan some hockey tickets on my way to put the towels in the linen closet. I stopped to listen to their conversation on the video-camera thing. Nothing unusual about that! I was about to carry on when I heard Ethan say "I'd really like to go on a date with _you._ You and I have this connection, that's really special." What the fuck?! Was Ethan gay? No problem if he was, but he always seemed straight… I listened some more. "I feel like there is some cosmic reason that we were thrown together. Plus, you're, like, really pretty." My eyes widened and I fell through the door. **(Goddammit. That was one hell of a paragraph. Pain in the ass to write by hand, too. :C) **

Ethan POV:

"I have, ah, hockey tickets. I thought maybe you and Benny would like to come along. I'll, uh, I'll leave them here." He set the tickets on the nightstand. Really dad?! I might have actually made a breakthrough!

"Dad! This, uh, this isn't what it looks like! Well, maybe it is, but, uh… Could I talk to you? _Outside?_" **(And this, folks, is where we finally deviate from canon. Fasten your seatbelts, as the yaoi train leaves now.)**

"Uh, sure…" Dad said. We went outside the room and shut the door. Dad looked like he was trying hard to control his panic. I really did not want Benny to hear this before I was ready! "Son. What. The. Hell. Was. That. Were you trying to ask him out?!" I cringed. Straight to the point, this one.

"Okay, yes, I was trying to ask him out, but the dunce wasn't getting it and he was actually helping me to practice asking Sarah out but I actually like him but I'm not gay I'm bisexual and no I'm not going to choose to only date girls please don't hate me!" I panted, trying to catch my breath.

"Okay, well, I'm fine with that. As long as you're happy, I'm fine." He still sounded a bit panicky, though, so I wasn't too sure if I believed him or not. "Uh, quick question, though. This may be awkward, but, um, in the way of where to put things," he took a deep breath "areyougonnabetheguyorthegirl?" I blinked. Finally deciphering what he said, I facepalmed.

"Dad, um, the politically correct term would be top or bottom. Some people also use pitcher/catcher, seme/uke, etc. Just don't use guy/girl, and you'll be fine. But, now, um, I'll actually most likely be the bottom…" I rubbed the back of my neck sheepishly, face flushed bright red. **(Sorry, all you Top!Ethan fans, but in my eyes, Ethan is not the top.)** Dad then wandered off, forgetting his towels, muttering about Scotch and Mom. Well, shit. I didn't mean to come out yet… Sighing, I walked back into my room to face the slaughter.

Benny POV:

I was just trying to help my friend get a date! What on earth made the adorable dork get so flustered?! When I jokingly told him to "Be my man" with that towel, I actually semi-meant it. He looked like he suddenly got a fever though… **(Dx Oh god. Not again. Thank heavens for cut-and-paste.)** "I'd really like to go on a date with _you_." What's with the emphasis? Did he like me too? Oh, right. He was talking to _Sarah_. I was surprised at how bitter my thoughts were. "You and I have this connection, that's really special. I feel like there is some cosmic reason why we were thrown together." I interrupted him with a sigh.

"That's beautiful, Ethan." It really was. Practically inspiring! I actually believed he was talking to me. Until his next sentence that is.

"Plus, you're, like, really pretty." I sighed inwardly. As soon as I did, Ethan's dad busts in!

Ethan POV:

I walked back into my room after I no longer looked like a sunburned lobster. The room felt… different somehow. Suddenly Benny spoke, startling me. "E… Were you… Do you… Were you trying to ask me out?!" **(Oh SHIT! xD Ethan, he knows! RUN! xD)** My eyes widened comically. Oh shit. This was bad. "M-maybe?" I stuttered. Benny looked mad.

"Ethan. _Fucking._ Morgan. Give me a goddamn straight yes or no answer right now." I was terrified. I finally spoke in a small voice.

"Yes. Please don't hate me…" He looked positively violent now. I was scared out of my mind.

"I'm coming over." he growled. My eyes widened more, till they looked like they belonged in a fucking anime.

"Wh-Now? Like, Right now?!" I squeaked. His eyes narrowed.

"Yes. Right. Now. We need to talk. In. Person." He growled. His video screen went blank. Crap. This was gonna be bad…

* * *

I was now locked in a staredown with a very terrifying Benny Weir in my bedroom. Suddenly he spoke. "Why did you never tell me?" His voice was unexpectedly soft. I was startled. I had thought he might hit me…

"Well, I was denying it for so long, trying _so damn hard_ to be straight and like Sarah. But then one day I realized I had been lying to myself. I realized that I liked you. Maybe… I might even love you…" I finished, in a small voice. Benny looked as if he was going to say something, but I interrupted. Oh, nice move, Einstein… "No, shut up and listen to me. I understand if you hate me now, or don't want to be my friend. It would probably kill me inside, but I could deal with it if you were happy. Just… Don't tell anybody at school, okay? I don't want to be outcast any more than I am now." I looked at the floor, twiddling my thumbs. Benny quickly moved towards me. I instinctively stepped back, raising my arms to about chest height for protection. He kept moving forward until I was backed up against the window. He put his hands on either side of my head to keep me from escaping. I blinked up at him, terrified.

"Ethan, you're right. We shouldn't be friends anymore. Not after what you just said." I knew it. Benny didn't want to be friends with a _fag._ I felt tears pricking at my eyes, and I turned my head away from him.

"Okay.. I think… I think that I'll leave now then…" I said in a small voice. He grabbed my face and turned it towards him.

"No, E, you're not going anywhere. Not without me." I was confused.

"Benny, what do yo-mmph!" My words trailed off as his lips covered mine.

Benny kissed me.

_Benny_ kissed me.

Benny _kissed_ me.

Benny kissed _me_.

I was frazzled. Who wouldn't be! He smirked and moved closer to my ear, he whispered "Ethan, we can't be friends anymore because I want to be so much more." My mouth dropped. Nothing but a squeak came out. He smirked. "Ethan, will you be my valentine?"

**A/N: Oh, god. That ending. I was dropping Flowers for my Valentine references everywhere, BTW. I tried toning down the comments a bit, as too much can get annoying. xD. Fucking Grooveshark though. It's being a bitch. 'Nuff said. Plus, to clear up a few things, the whole boyfriend fiasco I went through was in 6th grade. I knew him in 2nd grade. People can become total assholes over the span of a few years. Hell, over a few months! Plus, I wasn't too interested myself. (I also stand by what I said in the beginning though. Sarah is one sexy bitch.) This whole thing is pretty much rated for the author's pottymouth… xD Sorry guys. But as I'm still not an adult, my parents don't let me swear openly. So I'm currently closeted in the dungeon-ahem, basement of my dad's house at 12 in the morning swearing. Sorry… I have lots of pent up anger. You know what? Fuck this entire Author's Note. AND FUCK YOU TOO GROOVESHARK! :-(. Hope you all enjoyed, check out my profile, I have a bunch of different fics there, as well as a couple ongoing fics. Give me a favorite or a follow, and I'll update a little less sporadically. If you came here from AJ in Wonderland, Hi! If you came here from the Archive, Hi! Drop me a review/PM, follow me, whatever. I also have a tumblr and WattPad where I post fics as well. My username is TheArtisticIntrovert. (I'll be posting Dead Man Files on WattPad too, in maybe a year? Gotta wait for Charisma to finish her bit.) This fic is probably the longest fucking one-shot I've ever written. The insults/words/ideas/etc. about the LGBT community are not my actual thoughts. It would actually make me a hypocrite, since I am bisexual myself. Just thought I should clear that up. Anyway, if you read this whole thing, here's some cookies. If you just skipped to the end, sorry… I had a lot to say… BYEEEEEEEEEE! **

**~Sparkle**

_**Update 3/20: Sorry guys! I was having formatting issues. Anyway, if you got a notice for AJ in Wonderland, but can't find it, that's because it needs refinement. Google Docs to FFN is annoying. Bye guys!**_

_**~Sparkle**_


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